Do you ever feel like people have already made their minds up about who you are before they’ve had a chance to get to know the real you? Many of us face this problem daily, making it difficult for us to open up and allow people into our lives truly. But there are ways to combat these assumptions and address them head-on. Below are the top 20 things that people often wrongly assume about others—from hobbies and interests to life goals and even character.
1. That I Have Dementia
One user shared, “I’m 70 years old, look older, retired and walk 3X every day. People stop their cars assuming that I have dementia and am lost.”
Another user replied, “I used to work in home care for the elderly. The first day, I showed up for a lovely woman who was about 80, and I was ready to do what I normally did—feeding assistance, bathing, etc. She greeted me at the door with walking shoes and said, ‘Hey! Are you my new walking partner?’ She just hired someone for the company on walks. That woman was more fit and capable than me!”
One user added, “That was my dad. He was perfectly healthy until he was 82 and could probably walk farther than I can.”
2. That I’m Bad at Driving
“I’m an Asian guy with glasses. People assume I’m bad at driving and good at math. I’m bad at both,” a Redditor posted.
One user commented, “Bahahahaha.”
Another user replied, “I really loved that in The Babysitters Club, Claudia, the Asian girl, was really bad at math and all her studies but was an amazing artist.”
3. That I’m Outgoing and Approachable
A Redditor commented, “That I’m approachable and will want to talk to them. I just have one of those faces, unfortunately.”
One user replied, “A ‘High trust face’ can be an asset, though probably not as much for people with depression. I am indeed tired of alcoholics trying to tell me their Vietnam flashbacks. My problems are always viewed as ‘complaining’ because I cannot have any reason to be dissatisfied with anything in my life reasonably, looking the way I do.”
4. That I’m an Extrovert
A user shared, “That I’m an extrovert. I’m just really good at faking it and find you exhausting.”
One user replied, “YES! I tell people I’m introverted, and they say, ‘No, you’re not; you’re such a good communicator and socialize regularly.’ Yeah, it’s a skill I developed because I was tired of people calling me weird, quiet, and stuck up because I didn’t want to talk.”
5. I Know the Answers
One Redditor posted, “My wife assumes that I know the answer to the multiple questions she has about the T.V. show we are both watching for the first time.”
A user shared, “Ahahahaha, this is my mom! I took her to see ‘Mamma Mia,’ halfway through the first act, she turned to me and said, ‘So which one is the dad?'”
Another user commented, “Welp, I just realized an annoying aspect of my personality, thanks … “
6. That I’m Helpless and Insecure
“That I’m very helpless and insecure. It’s a result of my disability. Disabled people generally struggle with the problem that able-bodied people frequently infantilize them. In my case, this may be stronger than in others because I’m blind. When you’re blind, your body motions, especially how you walk, tend to be very cautious.
“This has multiple reasons. For starters, I obviously don’t want to get hurt (it still happens, but I try to avoid it). Secondly, I don’t want to break things. For example, when I’m in an unfamiliar place, I’m always super rigid and careful because I’m scared I will knock over something and cause a giant mess (it has happened before). Thirdly, I also use my hands to explore my surroundings. When I step into a room, I can’t just ‘take it in’ in a single glance like sighted people can. I need to explore it with my hands and my body. This takes much longer than simply looking at something.
“Not being able to see also means I need to memorize everything. For example, I need to learn where the door is, how far away it is from the table, etc. This takes up tons of brain space that sighted people can use for other tasks. Sometimes, I get lost, and I need to re-orient myself. I know it sounds funny, but I’ve even managed to get lost in my 2-bedroom apartment once or twice.
“I know these situations quite well by now, so they don’t stress me out as much as they used to. I simply gather my thoughts, touch my surroundings, and after a minute or two, I’m re-oriented. However, I’ve noticed that sighted people find it very hard to watch this. They want to help me (which is nice), but seeing me like this also gives them the impression that I’m a lost little child who’s feeling completely insecure.
“This view of me as a blind person can sometimes be very frustrating, especially when trying to talk to a woman. I’m an adult, and I actually feel just as confident as the next person. I just look more insecure and helpless because I’m slower, because I bump into s- and because I sometimes get a little lost. But it’s not actually a big deal. It just takes extra patience on my part to deal with those situations,” posted one user.
7. I Can Fix Their Computer
An online user added to the thread, “People assume I can fix their computer because I work in I.T.”
One user replied, “I.T. here, family and friends bring me their electrical appliances just because I fix computers they think I can repair these items too. Gosh! Even smartphones and other stuff. Really folks?!”
One user added, “I used to work in a computer repair shop and people would bring in the wackiest s- and then act so surprised when I wouldn’t work on it. Some things I remember: a slot machine, a rotary telephone, automotive stereo head units or amps, an electric smoker (???)
“Also honorable mention to all the dumba- that brought in a $40 inkjet printer or cheap toy Walmart tablet with a cracked screen … 1 hour of our time would cost double the price of a new one.”
8. That I’m All Muscle, No Brains
“That I’m a jock, all muscles, no brains. I’m tall and like to workout, but I literally know nothing about sports. Obsessed with anime, video games and chess,” one user shared.
One replied, “Sitting in front of some buff dude playing chess seems scary.”
One chuckled and added, “I dunno, seems kinda hot to me … “
9. That I’m Always Angry
A user shared, “That I’m always angry. No. I have a resting B face. I’m actually quite fine. You assuming I am angry is what actually makes me angry.”
One user added, “The amount of times strangers have walked up and told me to smile is ridiculous. Like I’m just reading a book or enjoying the sun or playing on my phone, I don’t need to be smiling all the time.”
10. That I’m a Racist
“People assume I’m a racist often enough because of how I look/dress. (I wear work pants, boots, and outdoor types of clothes, and I have a pretty long beard.) usually, they’re total strangers if/when these situations come up. I had a girl at this bar in Virginia Beach basically screaming at me one night that I don’t understand the plight of immigration and that I’m just some dumb white hick whose parents were probably enslavers. I’m a first-generation American. My father is an immigrant from Romania.
“Edit: something I’m noticing in a fair amount of replies is people can relate in a different way than I expected. People assume they’re racist, so more racists show up and just start dumping their world views on you guys? What f- lmao? I mean, it happened to me once, that’s true, but I was drunk and really wanted a cigarette. This absolute psychopath had marbs, so I listened to his demented ideas for like 3 minutes before I succeeded in bumming the cig,” posted one user.
One user replied, “I grew up in a rural area and ended up though I’m half Mexican; I like to joke that I got the white half while my brother got the Mexican half. I also drive an old El Camino, like to go camping, and go target shooting with my friends. So, people always assume I’m a conservative redneck. I’m actually a leftist (or classical redneck); I have multiple degrees and a job doing RnD for renewable energy.
“Despite this, I get a lot of people (friends of friends) who tell me they didn’t like me at first because they assumed I was racist or misogynistic until they got to know me. I also get old white guys saying racist s- to me, thinking I’ll agree with them. I shut that down quickly.”
11. That I Don’t Have ADHD
One user shared, “That I can’t have ADHD when I tell them about my diagnosis. ‘Oh, but you don’t fiddle around a lot or are impulsive enough to have that.’
“Please look up the different types of ADHD before you make assumptions. Thanks.”
One user replied, “My son’s teachers are skeptical at first that he has ADHD because he masks so well around anyone but family. It’s exhausting for him to try to control himself all day, and he lets it all hang out once he gets home.”
Another added, “My 7yo has ADHD, and we always know how good of a day she had by how much of a s- show she is when she gets home, lol. Good day = melt down the second the door swings shut. (We have found if we feed her almost immediately, it curbs this. The meds suppress her appetite, so she’s ravenous when she gets home.)”
12. That I Am Arrogant
“I’m introverted, so when I go out and meet new people, I don’t talk so much. It got to my ears that people assumed that I was arrogant. They can’t get that you can be good-looking and well-dressed but have social anxiety,” one user shared.
One user replied, “Hello, Mr. Darcy.”
Another user added, “I’ve heard this my whole life. I was constantly called rude and stuck up because I was shy and had awful social anxiety.”
13. That I’m ‘Up to No Good’
One online user posted, “People often think I’m ‘up to no good’ bc I have lots of piercings and tattoos. But my full-time job is taking care of dementia patients. I hug and kiss the ones who let me; I sincerely have a soft spot for them. ”
One user answered, “This is precious …”
14. That I Grew up Sheltered
“That I grew up sheltered. I’m timid from growing up in a violent household, not a sheltered one,” one user posted.
Another user replied, “This. I look freaked out because I know too much, not too little.”
15. That I’m Borderline Broke
One user added to the thread, “That I’m borderline broke. I drive my Mum’s 20-year-old car that she doesn’t use anymore, get all my clothes in charity shops (which I love and talk about enthusiastically), and the only social events I tend to show up at are festivals.
“I make really good money; I’m just very unmaterialistic day to day and spend my money on things people don’t necessarily notice or that I don’t brag about. I’m also an introvert and find social interaction exhausting, so I invest that energy in significant events, and I’m very quiet the rest of the time. And I go on holiday by myself!”
16. That I’m Stuck up and Aloof
One Redditor posted, “That I am stuck up and aloof and think I’m better than them. I’m actually just shy with self-esteem struggles.”
One agreed and shared, “Same! At least in high school. At 34, I’ve 70% grown out of that. I smile a LOT, so people probably actually think I’m just on drugs now.”
17. That I’m an Airhead
“That I’m an airhead. A taxi driver once said to me ‘You study PHYSICS?? You don’t look like you’d study physics!!’ … “, posted one user.
One user added, “‘You don’t look like a physicist’ drives me insane (30F). Like, just tell me you’re a misogynist ffs.”
18. That I’m a Devout Christian
One user said, “I’ve had several people assume I’m a devout Christian. I kind of enjoy telling them I’m an atheist and haven’t ever gone to church other than weddings or funerals. ‘Oh, but you’re so nice?’ Yeah, I don’t need religion to be nice.”
One user replied, “The last time I walked into a church, all the statues got up and walked out.” Quote from my deceased cousin. He was a great man.”
19. That I Had No Other Options
One Redditor shared, “People think I had no other options in life, and that’s why I do O—F—. That isn’t true. I could have been a cam girl.”
A user replied, “Tell me you’re joking.”
20. That I’m Completely Untrustworthy
One user added to the thread, “That because I had a drug problem in the past that I’m completely untrustworthy despite being sober for years.”
One user responded, “D-… I can only imagine.”
Another user commented, “This is me, but with a past pretty bad self-harm addiction, I’ve seriously had people while I’m eating take away my knife or like before handing me a freaking butter knife go ‘are you ok?’ Like, bro, they are all scars. You know that means that they’re old. Also, even during it, I never just randomly grabbed a knife at dinner time and went ape s- in front of everyone, especially with a butter knife would be like a last resort. They’re so dull. People don’t trust me, but also they treat me like I’m a delicate little crazy thing, a little ticking time bomb. Like bro I’m just trying to butter my toast in peace.”
Do you agree with the things listed here? Let us know your thoughts!
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