When people first start dating, they often leave the key issues unresolved. We’ve all swept different issues under the rug in order to keep things running smoothly. But sweeping these problems away is not always a good idea; it’s better to have an honest conversation; that simple, challenging step can save you from a disastrous relationship. It’s important to recognize red flags that signal potential conflicts and know when it’s time to move on.
In this blog post, we are diving into 14 massive red flags that everyone should be aware of to ensure their relationships don’t end in heartbreak!
1. Isolating You From Others
One user posted, “Any attempt to isolate you from others long term.”
Another user affirmed, “I had a dude friend who got a psychologically manipulative, possessive girlfriend. He stopped hanging around most of his friends…”
Another user responded, “One of my best friends started dating a bikini barista last year. I’ve been able to get a hold of him maybe twice in 12 months.”
2. Forcing You to Give up Friends
One user also shared her first-hand experience and posted, “I was a victim of isolation. It’s a lot like the boiling frog analogy. The changes were so subtle and unnoticeable until it was far too late. On the bright side, I now know what to look out for: never again.”
Another user responded, “Same happened to me. Luckily, I got rid of her and started making new friends, and life is great now. Also, knowing what to look out for is great, so the same will never happen again.”
One user answered the comments, “It’s tough, yo, depression hits me hard too. I think our kind of personality puts us on target for those kinds of people. Stay strong fellow human!”
3. All Their Exes Were Crazy
One Redditor shared, “If they say all of their exes were crazy/abusive, run.”
One replied, “Can 100% confirm, didn’t know about this til after, but yep all it means is they’re going to blame the other person for everything, and lie, cheat, or steal to make it seem true. Hot or not, just run.”
“Yeah… learned this the hard way myself,” another user responded.
4. They’re the Crazy One
A user also shared, “Came to say this exact thing. Figured it out with the last guy I dated before my husband. He was constantly saying how crazy his exes were… then he spent all night sitting in his car outside my apartment when I canceled a date due to being sick and accused me of cheating when one of my colleagues brought me medicine and walked my dog.”
5. Won’t Take No for an Answer
A user shared, “They don’t take no for an answer. If you say no and they continue to push, whine, manipulate, cajole, even for something small, walk away. Because if they won’t respect your no on the small stuff they certainly won’t respect or accept it with the big stuff.”
“Too late, already married,” one user answered.
6. Perpetuating Family Dysfunction
Another user responded, “Then do everyone else a favor and don’t have kids. Get a divorce. I’m the child of a couple that made the same mistake and stuck together the whole time because they’re boomers and boomers just don’t know any better. Especially the ones who… [have] children they have zero business having. It ruins lives though and mostly only perpetuates severe mental disorders for even more generations. Do not do it. If you have children and they’re intelligent, they are virtually guaranteed not to appreciate you for it. That’s also something boomers never understood. We learn the truth eventually and realize that what they did was really… irresponsible and then we lose all respect for them. So yeah, know that if you do that, it’ll most likely come back decades later to bite you in the a-.”
7. Trash Talking
One user shared, “Trash talking about their exes 24/7.”
Another user commented, “People who trash talk as a hobby. No single human in their life is good? Guess what category you’ll be in if you sign up to participate.”
8. Not Accepting Their Own Mistakes
One commenter shared, “The blind ignorance, when people are incapable of accepting their mistakes and stupidity. Instead they keep lying and believing in themselves no matter what.”
Another user shared, “I’ve been in this situation before. It was bad because not only was she doing what you stated, but she was also manipulative and would try to make you agree with her by arguing to no end. Then she would say [I was] ‘treating her bad when I [didn’t] agree with her.”
One user added, “I suppose lots of people have been through it, and how blessed it is when you can easily recognize this, to be honest. In fact, I used to be this sort of person myself. Thanks to righteous and good people who helped me come to consciousness and taught me to be rational. I hope you’re fine and have settled your situation.”
9. Treating Service People Poorly
One user commented, “Treating service staff poorly.”
Another user answered, “*people.”
10. Talking Behind People’s Backs
One Redditor added, “People who complain or say nasty things about friends or coworkers behind their backs. This may seem harmless, or even make you feel special that you are in their confidence, but it means they likely do the same thing to you.”
Another user replied, “But what if Susan really is a dumb b**ch?”
Another user asked, “Or Barbara? Asking the important questions here.”
One user answered, “This isn’t always true . I would 100% moan about a couple of people I had to work with cos they were absolute [jerks] … doesn’t mean I was doing the same to people who weren’t absolute [jerks] though.”
11. Irresponsible With Money
One user posted, “People who are financial disasters.”
Another user confirmed, “Yes. Poor financial management in a long-term relationship is a recipe for disaster. I learned this the hard way, and it took awhile to bounce back.”
12. Blaming Others
One user commented, “Do they own their mistakes or do they blame others?”
Another Redditor added, “Seriously, though, this trait can tell you so much about a person.”
13. Never Apologizing
One user shared, “I’ve met plenty of people who own up to their mistakes. But, that’s all they do. They think being honest about doing something bad absolves them. They don’t apologize, and if they do, it’s not sincere. They don’t try to make it up. They don’t try to be a better person. And worse of all, they make the ‘mistake’ again.”
14. They’re Always “Just Joking”
One Redditor shared, “When they say something rude and simply play it off with ‘I am just joking’ EVERY SINGLE TIME.”
A second user responded, “They’re NOT just joking. The ‘joke’ for them is that you buy [their] opinions. They’re laughing inside. Virtually guaranteed.”
Another user replied, “My response, if a truly icy one is warranted, is ‘Odd, I thought jokes had to be funny,’ or asking them earnestly, ‘I don’t get it, explain it?’ which forces them to admit ‘Oh, uh, see it’s funny because he’s fat,’ and admit they’re [a jerk] or to retreat entirely, either way they’re not liable to try that maneuver again.”
Do you agree with the red flags listed above? Share your comments below!
Source: this Reddit thread.
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